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Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Why Am I Here?


I was originally on the waiting list to study abroad. My thought at that point was, if God wants me to go to Africa, He will make it happen. I trusted in Him to make the decision for me. So now that I’m here, I’m trying to figure out why He sent me here. I’ve been asked several times, both before coming and since being here, why I chose Africa. Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t know why I chose here over Spain or Taiwan. I feel like most of the stuff I’ve learned about myself I could have learned anywhere. But I want to explain what I have learned, first specifically about Cape Town, and then in general. I’d like to share this with you, but this is also just for my personal “rumination” and gain, so just bear with me.
Begin with me by answering this question: Two men were walking down the street, one white, the other black. They were dressed in similar clothing, both had tattoos, and had cigarettes in their mouths. Who would you most likely to expect to rob you? Be completely honest. You’d probably choose the black guy right? Why?
My point is that, no matter how far America has come, racism still exists. Even if you had chosen the white guy, there had to have been some inclination that the color of his skin would cause him to commit a crime over the other one. The only difference in the description I gave you between the two was the color of their skin, and you (I’m assuming) chose one of them over the other. Most of us would choose the black guy because we are white. Do you see where I’m going with this? When I worked at the U2 concert last weekend, the whites were handling the money and the colored were doing the dirty work. Seriously, I was the only white girl doing the grunt work. The apartheid here may have ended nearly 20 years ago, but its effects are still so prevalent. It takes time to heal. And even though I’m on the other side of the world, America’s racism has become so apparent to me. It’s just hidden. But we all think it.  Everyone is racist. Even describing someone as black is sometimes taken to mean something bad. It’s like…the last resort in describing someone is to say they’re black. But why? What’s so bad about it?
            Cape Town residents are also very chill. There’s a thing called African Time. Every African, at least in Cape Town, uses it. It’s kind of like Bjorklund time, but worse. Seriously, when they say they’ll be 5 minutes, they could mean an hour. I’ll be honest, it’s annoying. I’ve spent a lot of time waiting because of it. But it’s also partly the reason I’ve allowed myself to ruminate. I’m in no rush… I’m just trying to take things as they come. At home it’s like, I have to this, and then this, and then that, and then that, and then I’ll eat lunch as a break, and then I’ll do that…you get the idea. Don’t get me wrong, To-Do lists do exist here. But they’re just handled in a different light here.
            People hug a lot here. I’m a hugger, and I think people hug a lot here. It’s actually quite beautiful. Africans have a word they use called “ubuntu” and it is considered a way of living. It means community. It doesn’t matter whether we met 5 seconds ago, or 5 years ago, they don’t shake hands…they hug. Just think about everything that this encompasses, I don’t want to write it all out…
            Alright, now on to the personal lessons I’ve learned. These experiences, I feel, are more from the basis of being away from home, with little contact to people I’m used to seeing everyday, and really having to figure things out on my own.
            There are 3 big changes that I’ve tried to make to my daily habits since being here. The first is to keep a food log. The second is to exercise more. These two go together, so I’m going to explain them together. I’ll be honest, I started these two things because, for the first month of being here, I couldn’t stop eating. I constantly felt hungry and I started to feel fat. But it’s turned into something more than that. My body is my lifeline, but it is also God’s creation. I wouldn’t have this body if it weren’t for God (or my parents…but that’s besides the point). If I don’t take care of it, I’m not protecting God’s creation. It also means I’m just not being healthy, which could cause serious health problems… obviously.  I have become more aware of what I eat and how much I eat through my food log, and I have become more aware of my body’s strengths and weaknesses through exercising. It’s a learning process, and I’m still journeying through this process. And I can’t wait to keep learning. The third change I’ve made is that I get up a half hour earlier in the morning to spend time reading the Bible. I’ve tried this before, but it’s always only lasted like two days and then I get tired. But I think since being here I have realized how important God is in my life. He is a priority now. And He’s beautiful.
            To delve into God’s love deeper is the biggest thing I’ve learned since being here. I came here knowing one person, and she was an acquaintance. She’s now my roommate, and I’m extremely grateful for her. But essentially, I came here on my own. Or so that’s what I thought at first. But God brought me here, and He is with me every moment of every day. When I don’t feel like I have anyone to talk to, I talk to Him. When I feel homesick, I pray for His strength. When I need patience, I ask Him. I’ll be honest; I’m still learning to trust Him. I still complain a lot. But I’m becoming more aware of it. I’m here with His blessing because He wants me to realize how much I have at home, how good and beautiful His creation is, and how much He has to offer outside of the Pacific Northwest. He’s brought me here for other reasons that I have yet to learn, and that’s the great thing about it all. I’m here for four months. It feels like I’ve been here forever already, and I’m eager to go home. But before I do, I know I still have so much to learn, and He’ll guide me through it all. I have good lecturers here, but the greatest teacher is God. The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are all working in and around me to allow me to ruminate on my experiences, to learn from the people around me, and learn to love and trust the biggest, greatest God ever.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

2/20/11


2/20/11 8:20 PM
            This week has been an interesting one. I was exhausted, then incredibly giddy, then homesick, the tired again, then giddy again…you get the idea. Right now I’m…tired. But I am grateful for a relaxing weekend.
            In the first couple weeks of being here, we had a lecture about culture shock. One of the stages of culture shock that was explained to us was when everything irritates you. This is how I was this week. Like seriously, EVERYTHING irritated me. I’m over it now, but I think after having such a busy weekend last week, I was just overly exhausted and just needed some “me” time. I spent the first couple days of the week writing a research proposal that I had spaced about, on top of all my other normal weekly readings. But after Wednesday, it was better because I had turned it in. On Thursday I went to the primary school to observe again, and it was super good. I was there for over seven hours, so I felt like I got a really well rounded experience. I did some reading tests, helped a few kids write out their names, and did some organizing. The teacher, Lavona, was also able to give me some background on why she teaches what she does and stuff, so that was cool.  That night us girls stayed up late talking, and it was super fun.
            You’ll be so jealous of what I did on Friday. Maybe. I thought it was cool at least. After class, a group of Cornerstone peeps carpooled down to the Cape Town Stadium to work at the U2 concert. That’s right, I worked at a concession stand at the stadium, the stand closed just in time for U2 to come on stage, and then I got to watch them for free. And I’m getting paid. It’s a long story how it came about, but how sick is that!? The working part wasn’t super fun, and it made for a good 20 hour day of school and working, but it was all worth it. U2 isn’t one of my favorite bands or anything, but they were really good live, and it was in South Africa, so it was automatically awesome.
            Yesterday Krystle and I were so exhausted that we slept till nearly noon, and then just sat around all day. We did a little baking, hung out with our host mom a lot, and watched a movie. Then this morning we got up and watched another movie, ate some French toast, and then went to the mall to get some coffee and use the internet for a while. We went to the Hillsong church again this evening, which was good. Now we’re just relaxing, and I need to do a bit more homework. I’ve been having this issue with just putting homework out of my mind on the weekends, so when Sunday night hits I have a boatload of work to do. All well, I enjoyed my weekend while it lasted.
            I definitely struggled/am struggling with homesickness more this week than I have so far. But it’s still not as bad as I expected it to be. Things are constantly busy, so the days fly by and the weeks are gone in a flash. This next weekend we head to Johannesburg to do some sight-seeing up there with the other Americans. We only have 4 more weeks of classes, 10 days in the Eastern Cape, a week in a township (that’ll be an interesting experience…) and then 3 weeks of whatever we want to do before coming home. It’ll be over so soon, but yet it feels like so long at the same time. I’m trying really hard to be optimistic and know that this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I know I will regret it if I go home knowing that I didn’t embrace the opportunities as much as I could… so I’m trying to avoid it. It’s just hard sometimes.
            I pray that you all had a great week and a relaxing weekend as well. Lots of love.


Sunday, February 13, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day!

2/13/11 9:20 PM
            And another week has passed…. And I’m tired. Let’s hope for a good night’s rest tonight before another great week of classes.
            The first few days of the week weren’t super exciting. Just went to school, hung out on campus doing homework afterwards, went home, did more homework, talked with the family, went to bed. I was able to get some logistics worked out with my Doctrine of the Triune God lecturer so that I can get credit for it at Fox, so that’s good.
            I was finally able to get some time in a primary school classroom on Thursday! Praise Jesus for it finally working out! I’m doing a 30 hour observation time in a special needs class at a school called Denneguer Avenue. Ironically, the teacher’s name is Lavona (same as my host mom). It’ll definitely be an experience… there’s a lot to take in as far as differences in teaching techniques and everything goes. But it’ll be a great learning opportunity. I’ll also probably be able to sit in on some regular classrooms as well, so that’ll be cool.
            After class on Friday some of us went to a restaurant for pizza and just hung out. Krystle’s really good about forcing me to go out and meet people. She doesn’t have to do much convincing, but it’s nothing I would initiate on my own. I’m glad to have her around. Friday night was our host brother Aaron’s 7th grade Valentine’s Dance, and we ended up going and helping out. It was pretty entertaining… he goes to a boys’ school, but the girl’s school is right next-door, and the dance was for both. Lavona is making the valentines for the boys to give to their “special girl.” Before the dance, Aaron needed her to make 2… afterwards he needed 5. And he looked pretty awesome in his skinny jeans, white t-shirt with a sports jacket, and his sports cap. He thought he looked pretty awesome too.
            We finally made it to the beach on Saturday! But first we went to breakfast with Lavona and Josh. Krystle and I each enjoyed a delicious vanilla latte (flavored coffee is hard to come by here) and I had some French toast. Then we met up with this guy Robin and went to Muizenberg beach. It had a really cool vibe with brightly colored cabins lining the beach, people kicking soccer balls, and others surfing and kite surfing. We even enjoyed a delicious chicken salad at a restaurant overlooking the beach. I got to talk to my parents that evening, which is always great.
            Today Lavona, Jason, Krystle, and I went on the City Sightseeing Red Bus tour. They have these things in all the big cities, you’ve probably heard of them before. It was pretty cool, we didn’t stop at all the stops, but went to another beach and got fish and chips, walked around the “rich people” part of town, and went to the waterfront and looked at some cool artwork and listened to some live music. A small US Navy band was warming up for a performance, so we heard them play a couple songs. They were pretty good, and made me want to go see some live music. We’ve been talking about it, but now it definitely needs to happen!
            We went straight from the bus tour to the Hillsong church. It was the best church we’ve been to since being here… I want to keep exploring, but I wouldn’t mind going there again. You know the worship group Hillsong United? This is that church… or one of the locations, they’re all over the world.
            I’ve been pretty homesick the last couple days. I woke up Saturday morning knowing that I had dreamt about being at home or something, and I just haven’t been able to get it off my mind since then. Honestly, I haven’t had to battle homesickness as bad as I thought I would. The hardest thing to think about is still how long it will be before I’m home. But I’m not ready to go home, there’s still too much to see and explore and learn. It’s a weird feeling really. I think part of the reason is that I’m just busy all the time that I don’t really give myself time to breathe, and I’m not used to that. I haven’t really given myself much “me” time, and it’s starting to bog me down. Things have started to irritate me that wouldn’t normally, and I think it’s just because I’m getting overly tired from constantly going. I just have to learn that it’s ok to say no to some things so I can breathe.
            But anyways, Happy Valentine’s Day everyone! Special shout-out to my favorite guy Taran. J Love you all!!!

Monday, February 7, 2011

2/6/11


2/6/11 7:30 PM
            Can you believe it’s already February? Not only is it Feb, it’s the second week of Feb. Time flies, man, time flies.
            This last week was the first week of classes. I have three classes…African Worldviews, Doctrine of the Triune God, and Intro to Sociology. I’m not so sure about the African Worldviews class; it has the potential to be very interesting but the professor (or lecturer as they call them here) is new and doesn’t really seem to be the greatest teacher. We’ll see how it goes. I’m really excited about the Triune God class. I’ve been doing some reading for it today and there’s just so much to the trinity that I would never think of if it weren’t for this class. Intro to Sociology seems like it will be good too, I need to experience it a bit more before I decide, but I at least like the lecturer.
            Classes took up most of my week. I, unfortunately, came down with Strep Throat this past week, so it wasn’t super fun. I went to bed early every night, could hardly talk by Friday, and just wasn’t myself. My host mom told me she wanted the old Shelly back. But my host parents graciously took me to the doctor Friday night and I got some antibiotics and am now doing much better. I actually feel like I have more energy now than I did before getting sick. I think all my energy was pent up inside me this past week and now I’m letting it all out ;)
            Last night, Saturday, I had my first rugby experience. This guy Andrew from Cornerstone is like super into it, so he took us Americans to a preseason game to experience it. It was fun, but I really had no idea what was going on. Just a whole lot of huge guys running into each other without any padding on. But seriously, you should see how huge these guys are… their thighs especially. I don’t even know what to compare them to. Like…tree stumps or something. They’re just super muscular all over, and freakin’ tall.
            After the game we went out to dinner, which was fun. It’s been good to integrate with the South Africans at school and allow them to show us some of Cape Town. I feel less tourist-y when they take us, instead of on a bus going around to museums and such.
            We went to a different church this morning. We have now had the two extremes of churches here: extremely charismatic and extremely traditional. The church this morning was a Presbyterian church, which is what I attend at home, but this was even more traditional than my home church. Next week we’re going to try to find a “middle ground” church. It all adds to the experience, I guess.
            We’re always having interesting interactions with people here. This past week, Krystle and I were waiting for the bus and a not-so-cute guy came up to us telling us we were SO beautiful and started to serenade us. We also, within 10 minutes of that wonderful experience, saw a lady getting her bag rummaged through by a strange man… pick-pocketing I guess, but much more obviously done. We get whistled at everywhere cause we are so clearly not from around here. Krystle got made fun of by the waiter at the restaurant last night for how she pronounced “water” because they say it like “wata,” There’s no hiding that we are not from here.
            We still haven’t made it to the beach, but we’ve been talking with some Cornerstone peeps about taking us soon.
            So ya, that’s about it. As I was writing this, I listened to a David Crowder song that sings, “what a glorious day.” Isn’t it a glorious day? It is the day the Lord made, so rejoice and be glad in it.